The picture for my "need a pic friends"
I have a really good mixture of friends here on MySpace. They range in age, ethnicity, gender, and sexual orientation. That is just the way I like it.
I have never been really shy. I will answer anyones questions about me with as much truth and insight as I possibly can. I feel it is only fair. A lot of what scares people away from differences is ignorance and I feel that I have a duty to help someone to understand me in the hopes that they will understand the masses. I remember growing up and being around an interracial couple. I dont remember it well, because I was little, but I do have a very vague memory. It was normal. That is what I remember. My parents had some friends that happened to be a mixed couple. All there was to it.
I am a Butch Lesbian. What does that mean? Well, I am going to do my best to explain what it means to me to be Butch. I am sure most people know what Lesbian means, so I am going to skip that part.
When I was young, I enjoyed playing with boy toys, playing with the boys, wearing boy clothing, running around in my backyard without a shirt (because that is what boys did) and playing softball. All of those things were chalked up to me being a "Tom Boy". Even then, I didnt realize I was a Lesbian. I just thought I was different.
I know that there are a lot of women who when they were young were TomBoys, and now they are successful, beautiful, married to men, 100% straight women. Guess what? Awesome! However, I didnt grow up to be that way. Oh believe me, I tried. I dated guys all through High School trying to fit in, trying to feel loved, trying to hide me from the world.
One day I woke up. I wont go into all the details of "how I came out" blah blah blah because that is not what this blog is for. After 2 four-year relationships with 2 different women, it finally hit me what I wanted. I was 29 years old and I finally figured out what I wanted in life. I wanted a feminine woman. The reason I wanted a feminine woman was because I am Butch.
Butch to me is an attitude. One thing to clear up is that I DO NOT want to be a man. No offense to the men folk, but being Butch is not about being male. Not in any way, shape or form. Butch is chivalry opening doors, helping her on with her coat, taking her hand when she is stepping off of a curb, telling her that she is beautiful everyday even when she first wakes up, taking out the trash, helping with dinner, laundry, and dishes, gassing the vehicles, fighting like hell, making up, and lastly living my life for her.
Butch is appearance you might think that it is only mens clothing and short hair that would make a Butch, but it isnt. I have seen many a Butch with long hair. I have also seen a Butch in a nice womens suit. Now, neither of those looks are for me. I am a comfortable type. I like my jeans and t-shirts or nice dress pants and a button down shirt. I like to look sharp for my girl. My hair is short because I cant do a thing with it! (lol).
Butch is not domination. I dont "wear the pants" in the family (oh okay but only when SHE lets me). I dont make all of the decisions. I dont do all of the "man" things.
Butch is both an instinct and a learned behavior. I didnt always call myself Butch. I figured it out when I was much older. But I love who I am.
So, all in all... I was Born to be ME ...Kari Williams... Friend, Lover, Mother, Sister, Daughter... Butch.
~Peace
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